A Geographical Cure
Years ago, when I had a couple of friends who got a little too close to certain substances, I got to know some of the phrases they used when working to not use those substances. One of things they used to talk about was 'Geographical Cures'. They defined this as using a change of location to try to solve a problem. Some of them had even tried to solve their chemical problems by moving to a new house or city. Of course that didn't work, and generally a Geographical Cure is not a good solution to most problems.
But then, sometimes it is.
Sometimes things where you are so difficult that you can't fix them where you are. You have to get out of the situation by getting out of the place, thus giving yourself a chance to make things better.
Recently my family moved to a new house. In our case, it wasn't intended as a Geographical Cure, but it turned out to be one for us.
By way of explanation, first of all, both my husband and I work long hours. Despite having a minimum expectation for our daily/weekly hours, it is common for both of us to work more and, in some cases, a lot more. During a project back in the summer, my husband worked nearly two weeks without a break, including weekends. Similarly, when working on a specific assignment, I have pulled 9 hours days, back-to-back. It isn't our goal, but we're both people with a serious work ethic, so we often do whatever it takes to get the job done.
Then, there's commuting. I was working 29 miles, one way, from my office. Now sometimes I was onsite at a location closer to home, but this was the exception rather than the norm. So I was travelling nearly 60 miles a day. And trust me, those 300 mile weeks can really wear you down.
Add to that, our daughter needs childcare of some kind five days a week. At the moment, that's split between After School Club, which has strict deadlines on time, and her grandmother's house. So, in addition to the hours and the commuting, there's child pickup, often under the pressure of cut-off times. Whew!
So is it any wonder that we were struggling to keep up with our house?
I found myself having zero energy to tidy and clean up in the evenings, and this left so much extra to do on the weekends. Exhausted after long weeks, and also busy on the weekends, I found myself wanting to do less and less in our flat, and things began building up. And after a while, all that needed to be done just seemed more than I could even begin to do. I couldn't work up even the idea for where to start! As a result, we did the best that we could, but my home was never as clean or tidy as I believe it should have been, and nowhere near how I wanted it to be. And then It just seemed to become a vicious circle -- I couldn't catch up with all that was to be done, and I found myself having less energy and motivation to do what there was to be done, thus creating more to do. I just couldn't seem to find any way to get ahead.
Then, unexpectedly, we found a new house. We weren't really looking, but we saw a couple of signs out and decided to arrange to look at some houses. After looking a bit, we decided moving sounded like a really good idea, and there were a number of places we liked. And then we found our house -- which we love. It took three visits to be sure it was what we wanted, but every time we saw it we liked it more. Definitely the house for us!
Moving was a nightmare -- I'm quite sure I threw away more than I packed, but that was most certainly a very good thing. And the new house gave us not only a fresh start, but better circumstances all round. My commute is shorter, so my days aren't quite so long. Plus my house has many more windows and lots of light, so I don't feel trapped the way I (now realise I) did living in a flat. And starting out with a clean slate, I could 'begin as I mean to continue' and really make sure I keep my house as I want it to be.
So now I have a house that's a pleasure to live in and so much easier to keep as we want it. Of course it's not perfect, but we do love it here, and it's been the best change we could have made right when we needed it most.
So, of course I realise that Geographical Cures are definitely not the answer to life's problems. But every now and then, when you can't resolve your issue(s) where you are, it's something worth considering.
About Me
Leanne BennettI'm an American living in England, married to a Brit and the mother of three children. I work for the local council, building and maintaining servers and networks for primary schools.
I think my background, my citizenship, my experiences and my location give me a unique take on life. Herein are my musings on such...
